a friendly reminder…

this article has aggressive tone & harsh language , but sometimes the vulgarity helps call to attention the sense of urgency.  Nonetheless, it is still timeless and super thought provoking. reading this was a friendly reminder of some of the roadblocks we create for ourselves unconsciously.  i think there’s use in a lot more of this “if i knew then what i know now” dialogue across generations. there’s so much power in information sharing between women.

Enjoy the highlights below or read the full article by clicking here

xoxo,

Kimmy

Why You’re Not Married – Tracy McMillan

The problem is not men, it’s you. Sure, there are lame men out there, but they’re not really standing in your way. Because the fact is — if whatever you’re doing right now was going to get you married, you’d already have a ring on it. So without further ado, let’s look at the top six reasons why you’re not married.

1. You’re a Bitch.
The deal is: most men just want to marry someone who is nice to them. I am the mother of a 13-year-old boy, which is like living with the single-cell protozoa version of a husband. Here’s what my son wants out of life: macaroni and cheese, a video game, and Kim Kardashian.

2. You’re Shallow.

When it comes to choosing a husband, only one thing really, truly matters: character. So it stands to reason that a man’s character should be at the top of the list of things you are looking for, right? But if you’re not married, I already know it isn’t. Because if you were looking for a man of character, you would have found one by now. Men of character are, by definition, willing to commit.

3. You’re a Slut.
If you’re having sex outside committed relationships, you will have to stop. Why? Because past a certain age, casual sex is like recreational heroin — it doesn’t stay recreational for long.

4. You’re a Liar.
You know if you tell him the truth — that you’re ready for marriage — he will stop calling. Usually that day. And you don’t want that. Instead, you hang around, having sex with him, waiting for him to figure out that he can’t live without you. I have news: he will never “figure” this out. He already knows he can live without you just fine. And so do you. Or you wouldn’t be lying to him in the first place.

5. You’re Selfish.
If you’re not married, chances are you think a lot about you.  Howevs, a good wife, even a halfway decent one, does not spend most of her day thinking about herself.

6. You’re Not Good Enough.
You’re not looking for a partner who is your equal. No, you want someone better than you are: better looking, better family, better job.You are enough right this minute. Period. Not understanding this is a major obstacle to getting married, since women who don’t know their own worth make terrible wives.